Table of Contents
Introduction
Chapter 1: Know Yourself
Chapter 2 – Do Not Break, Just Bend Up to Your Capacity
Chapter 3 – Use Your Visualization Power
Chapter 4 – How Feeling and Looking Your Best Can Help You Achieve Your Dreams
Chapter 5 – Ways to Live a Life Without Excuses
Chapter 6 – Meditation – Complete Walk Through
Chapter 7 – Challenge Yourself to Walk on Water
Chapter 8 – Stay Clear of Toxic People and Behaviors
Chapter 9 – Building Your Support Network
Chapter 10 – Summing Up Everything Together
Conclusion
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Chapter 1: Know Yourself
The advice may seem tired, but the fact of the matter is that knowing yourself is a tried and true way of mastering your destiny. A person who doesn’t know themselves, inside and out, will not be capable of growing and changing in the ways that will help them to evolve as a person, because that person will likely be a slave to their vices without even knowing it!
Most of us have a hard time admitting our flaws and faults, even to ourselves. That gives them free reign over our lives, and a season pass to sabotage anything that we are working on. It is a sneaky way for us to get in our own ways without really being able to see the problem for what it is; an act of self-sabotage!
The most effective strategy in combating self-sabotage is to get to know yourself inside and out. This may seem simple, but it is probably going to be a lot more complex than you might think. It’s more than just sitting down and listing the things you think you know about yourself, which is a good start. This is a time-intensive process that you will need to do with the help of friends and family whom you can trust to tell you the truth, whether it hurts your feelings or not.
But before we involve anyone else in the process of getting to know yourself, first you have to figure out just what it is that you already have covered. One thing that may really help you is to take the Meyers-Briggs Personality test. Upon taking this test, you will find yourself placed in one of sixteen categories, and these categories each have a detailed profile that can help you understand more about yourself and the way you respond to certain situations and stimuli. This can also be useful in learning more about how you conduct yourself in relationships and as a part of a peer group, without having to rely on the feedback of your trusted friends and family.
These types of personality tests are also very insightful when it comes to the way one approaches their goals and whether or not they are realistic in the manner in which they attempt to achieve their dreams. Knowing your personality type may provide you with the insight you have been waiting for when it comes to which approach might work best for you in furthering your career or tackling the to-do list that has been put on the back burner for far too long.
Once you have a basic understanding of your personality type, you can begin to narrow your focus down onto what it is that you truly believe in. Each of us have core values that provide us with the drive that spurns us onward. If we don’t know what it is that we truly believe in, then it can be hard for us to feel fulfilled and our lives can lack in passion and motivation. But once we latch onto a core value that we truly feel passionate about, everything then begins to change. We can begin building a foundation for our lives and experiences based on these values; in a way that makes even the most mundane task begin to feel rewarding.
How might that be? Because we know that even the smallest task can accumulate to a major accomplishment. And when you are living a life that is true to your core values and beliefs, these major accomplishments are sure to be things that truly serve your life’s purpose. It is one of the most effective ways to make yourself feel like the master of your own destiny!
Many people simply don’t know themselves well enough to live a satisfying life, and this can be very sad. Whether it is a traumatic past that keeps you stuck, or it is simply a lack of self-knowledge or discipline, we all have to know who we are at the most fundamental level. Many people are so disconnected from themselves that they don’t even know what it is they like or don’t like. Now is the time to find these things out.
If you have a hard time with this, now is the time to trust your friends and family to help you see yourself objectively. Ask them what they think your biggest pet peeves are, what you truly care about, and what it is you enjoy doing the most. Consider their opinions on your flaws and weaknesses, and vices that you might need to keep in check. Remember that the fastest way to empowerment is in knowing your own weaknesses. Honesty about these weaknesses helps you to develop them so that they are no longer holding you back. Keep it up until you have been able to build them into strengths!
Goal: Start a journal. In this journal, outline the things that make you who you are. Write down your self-perception in as much detail as possible. Take a test online to find out your Meyers-Briggs Personality type, and journal about any insights you might have learned from taking this test.
Every day, write about a strength in yourself you have used recently and how it is positively impacting your life. Also, write about a weakness in yourself that you have pinpointed, and what you are doing to address it and balance it out so that you are taking control over your vices and turning them into strengths! A person with power over their own faults is a true master of their own destiny.
Chapter 2 – Do Not Break, Just Bend Up to Your Capacity
One thing that most people use as an excuse in giving up the control they need in their lives is other people. Other people get in the way. Other people make demands on their time so that they aren’t able to achieve the things that they want to accomplish. Other people are responsible for the fact that they aren’t able to get their lives organized and really take the reins.
While it can be true that other people may pose interesting challenges when it comes to achieving our goals, the fact is that there is a difference between accommodating others and having healthy relationships versus bending over backwards to be a people pleaser and spending way too much time in doing so. People who master their destinies don’t do it by kissing ass. They do it by putting their goals as their top priority and achieving them by any means necessary!
This doesn’t necessarily mean putting other people on the back burner. The fact of the matter is that humans are social animals, and we survive and thrive in communities where we help each other to evolve and learn. We work with people who rely on us, and if they find that we are willing to compromise ourselves for them, they will put us to work until we reach our limits.
But many of us have a tendency to want to make everybody around us happy, and sometimes that means putting our own happiness on the line. It can seem impossible at times to please everybody around us, and the person who wants to focus on mastering their own destiny should take this as a lesson. It is impossible to make everybody happy. That is why it is most important to make sure that we are focusing on ourselves.
This is not selfish. Actually, it is quite the opposite. When you are in an airplane that is crashing out of the sky, you are more likely to be able to help your elderly seat-mate if you know to put your oxygen mask on first. When we don’t wear the oxygen mask, we can’t effectively help those around us, because we haven’t taken care of ourselves first.
This is a lesson that anybody with a tendency to people-please should keep in mind. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we will not provide ourselves with sufficient care. That can be dangerous and difficult for us to reconcile later, when we find we are so bogged down with the weight of other people’s problems and expectations that we no longer know who we are anymore.
The key to mastering your own destiny is in being able to let yourself have the freedom you need to say no. You can still be a social animal. You can still cohabitate with others and enjoy your team at work and achieve goals in a group setting. But the trick is in being able to set healthy boundaries so that you don’t end up feeling as if you are being taken advantage of.
Like the mighty reed, we need to bend, compromising only what truly needs compromised in order to succeed. We cannot break ourselves by taking on too much weight at once. Anybody who can step on us to serve themselves is likely to do just that. What we need to do is learn how to set healthy boundaries. And the first step in doing so is to put the oxygen mask on yourself and identify where in your life you could be more assertive.
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